Succubus Shadows Chapter 13

I woke up next to bent, and for the quadrangle of sum of cashbeat, I thought I truly was waking waking up from an awful, awful dream ab come forward the Oneroi and every(prenominal)thing else that had happened since exercise set and I had broken up. He lay a tranquillity in bed with the sheets tangled virtually him, his turn on brown hair glinting reddish in the morning sun. He slept only in boxers, and his chest as trusteded substantial and smooth and perfect for nest against.His breathing was even, his posture thus far and relaxed. I drank it all in, all the dismiss bent details Id been missing for months. I swore that I could even smack him. Did dreams expect smells? This sensation did, I was certain. That soft woodsy-apple scent wrapped around me insufficiency an em bandeauce. afterward a few moments, he began to stir and sleepily open his eyes. He squinted at the light and rolled onto his congest, stifling a yawn. I wanted to roll good everywhere to him a nd snuggle against his warmth, coitus him all about the nightmares Id been having. in that locationfore, I realized in that location was no track I could go to him. I couldnt move. Well, that wasnt exactly reliable. There was more to it than that. I just didnt be possessed of a body. I was an observer only, worry the undetectable camera Id been with Roman and Jerome. This apparently was not a dream I was active in, and the realization of that solidifying home the terrible truth this was still an Oneroi dream. I hadnt imagined them. I hadnt imagined readiness and me breaking up.He sat up in bed and rubbed his eyes. It was such a familiar, nostalgic sight. Getting up was al manners hard for him, largely because of the bizarre writing hours he kept. He glanced everywhere at the clock, which was near the direction from which I was ceremonial occasion. His eyes passed right over where I would have been. Yes. I was just a touch modality in this. simply what was this exactly ? Truth or lie?The duration on the clock nine in the morning moldiness have been motivation enough for him to drag himself out of bed. Still in boxers, he stumbled into the outhouse, miraculously not walking into eitherthing in his sleepy state. While coppice his teeth, he noticed a note on the counter. I instantly recognized the writing because I cut it all the metre at the bookstore.Went in early at pbegrudge to ready a few things by means of and should be done by six. Bring Brandy by, if you chamberpot, to queue out on those shoes.Love,Maddie comprehend Maddies name jolted me out of the Seth Fantasyland Id been living in as he went through his morning routine. Expanding my vision now, I precept changes to his bathway things that hadnt been there when wed dated. Another excessivelythbrush, for one thing. Makeup in the corner. A knap robe on the bathroom hook. On the books, Maddie was still sharing a place with Doug, barely we all k newfound what the reality was . That pain that hadnt real go forth since my last dream grew tighter within my chest. She was all over this place. She had left her trade name everywhere, everywhere in this space he and I had once overlap to drawher. I had been replaced.Seth went through the rest of his routine, including a remarkably lush shower. He was notorious for staying in there forever temporary hookup plotting rough story line. I tried hard not to focus on the sight of him nude and wet and instead pondered where he might be pass to twenty-four hours. If it was just to write at the bookstore, he wouldnt have been piteous so briskly.He easily found clean boxers and jeans, exactly the hardest part of his day came next what T- decorate to wear? When wed been together, Id have sexd watching this. Id lie in bed after all, I had no pr matchlessing to ever get ready laughing while he deliberated and deliberated over his massive T-shirt collection. Each had its own hanger, dis animateing some bit of retroactive or pop culture novelty. Vanilla Ice. ALF. Mr. T cereal. He flipped through them all, studying each one care dependabley as his hand moved(p) each sleeve.Then, his fingers suddenly brushed against a sleeve far bring outinger than the others. His crush wasnt all T-shirts. There were a few sweaters and pullovers crammed into the sides. There was also a flannel shirt it was what hed stopped and noticed. Pushing the other shirts aside, he took the flannel off of its hanger and held it up, his motions almost reverent. make up without physical form, I had the sensation of my heart going still. I knew this shirt. It was one hed given me to wear a long time ago, the night Id passed out at his place from too more than alcohol. Id met his family the next day, flavor ridiculous with the flannel over my strappy party place. Even while dating, Id totally forgotten all about that shirt.He held it there between his reach, and the work out on his facethere was so more there, I didnt even hunch where to start. Seth was so good at keeping his expression neutral and could be extremely short-spoken when he chose. But here, alone, he was unguarded. There was sorrow on his face. Sorrow and regret. And when he held the shirt up and rested his head on it, I sawing machineing machine disposition as well. The whole mood was rounded out with a anatomy of helpless resignation. He inhaled deeply and then hung the shirt back up. As he did, I caught the faintest whiff of tuberose blossoms the leftover scent of my Michael Kors perfume. Seth had never worn or washed it again, I realized with a start. Hed just kept it like some sort of treasured arti particular.After that, he simply grabbed the archetypal T-shirt his hand came across, without even looking. It was an sexagenarian favorite of his, showing the Tasmanian Devil from Looney Tunes. Seths mood had shifted considerably, come out to something a forgetful more solemn and thoughtful than when hed gotten ou t of the shower. My observations didnt go into his head, though. I could only judge by outside signs.His reason for getting up dour out to be a trip to his brothers house. resembling endlessly, the elder Mortensens home was chaotic, with flyspeck adorable blond girls running around, numerous of them shrieking when they saw their favorite uncle. Hed barely stepped inside when Andrea, his sister-in-law, came out to go to bed him. She wore a corduroy jacket with her jeans and T-shirt, her blond hair slicked back into a neat ponytail. She gave Seth a startled look.You didnt bring your laptop? Andrea was as cheerful as always but appeared tired.He gestured over to where his twin nieces, McKenna and Morgan, were compete tug of war with a string of Christmas lights. It was odd because Christmas was over a month off and also because the lights were plugged in, which seemed like some sort of electrical risk to me. Apparently Seth matte the same way because he hastily intercepted t hem and removed the string of lights altogether, amid ofttimes protest.I dont depend Ill get much work done with these guys, he utter dryly.Yeah, she admitted. I seat see that. She glanced at her watch. Okay, gotta go. I dont know how long thisll take. no.problem, he utter. Do what you need to.She scurried out the door. I wanted to ask where she was off to but had no means. Again, I was reminded how out of the loop I was from the Mortensen world now. Once I would have know every detail.Kendall, a precocious nine-year-old, solemnly walked up to Seth. Uncle Seth, she said, will you play Loan with me?Seth arched an eyebrow. Loan? Whats that?Its where Im the mortgage broker, and you come to get a loan for a house but dont have the money for a down payment. She paused. Well have to make a pretend income fax for you.Tax, he corrected. And how about we go to the bookstore instead?She frowned. I want to play Loan.They have real estate books there, he said. I dont conceptualise we can play Loan without sufficient background.Okay, she conceded. We can go.Brandy strolled into the living room just then with her iv-year-old sister in her arms. Kayla looked like shed woken up from a nap and sleepily had her head against Brandys shoulder. I loved all the girls, but something about Kayla always affected me more strongly.Go where? asked Brandy, shifting Kaylas weight. Although she held her sister tenderly, Brandy had a dark cloud around her.To Emerald City.Brandy sighed. Dont you spend enough time there?Maddie got a few pairs of shoes for the manage and needs you to try them on.Brandy gave him a look that exquisitely expressed all of her skin sensess on that topic.Dont start, he warned, in as chastising a tone as Id ever hear him use. Welcome to adolescence, Seth.Is Georgina working? she asked.Kendall looked up from where shed been start to color. In orange crayon, a blank piece of paper read IRS.Yeah, can we see Georgina? Kendall piped in.Seth looked pained. I dont know if shes there or not.I didnt know either. I didnt know if this was a true or false dream. It felt true so far, but I didnt trust the Oneroi. Being an observer, I had to think I wouldnt be there. Certainly I wouldnt if this were true. I wondered what would happen at the store when I suddenly stopped showing up.I can just stay here while youre gone, Brandy said. Mom doesnt mind if Im alone.Then you cant try on the shoes. Which defeats the whole purpose.After a carefully worded discussion, in which Brandy suggested he just bring the shoes to her, she finally conceded. With the whole clump along, they had to take the Mortensen van, which Seth didnt seem overly thrilled about. But there was no other way to transport five girls, one of whom necessary a car seat.The troop arrived at Emerald City. Seth left the four younger ones in the kids section, which was a wonderland of picture books, puzzles, and stuffed animals. Janice was working that area today and told him shed keep an eye on the girls. Seth also put Kendall in charge of her sisters, with the bribe that hed buy her some finance books.That left him and Brandy to uprise Maddie, who was holed up in an procedure. Her face lit up when she saw them, and she lots flew from her seat to give him a quick kiss. Brandy scowled, and a troubled feeling burned within me. The love on Maddies face was so obvious, so stronganyone could see it. She made no attempts to hide it, even at work. I hated their relationship, but how could I resent her feelings? How could I resent her loving the man who meant the world to me?Hows work? he asked her, smiling fondly. Was that his way of showing love too? How had he looked around me? For some reason, I was certain hed been differenthadnt he? I couldnt remember.Maddie gestured to the desk she shared with Doug. A little crazy. Yet strangely boring. Im stuck on paperwork all day. Performance reviews.Hey, Im stuck on paperwork every day.She rolled her eyes. Bad joke. And not the s ame at all.Try move some sex and violence into the reviews, and they might go faster.I was too disturbed by their banter to pay much attention to the fact that Maddie was doing my job. Brandy looked equally pained by the conversation. As Maddie and Seth spoke, I canvas him further, act to read his feelings. Yes, there was affectionyet, it reminded me a little of the warm indulgence he showed his nieces.At last, Maddie produced a shopping bag full of shoes. Brandys dress was hanging in the office, and Maddie ordered Seth to leave while his niece changed.Just before he was shooed out, Maddie remarked to Brandy, Im glad this color looks good on you. I decided to do everything purple because of how great it looked on Georgina. I found some awesome flowers that go with it all too.Oh, fucking fantastic. I had influenced the color scheme for their wedding. Seth left, and I went with him. He wandered through the store, search through books an activity he never tired of. Several employe es said hello to him as they passed by.Including me.Seeing as the Oneroi had put me in dreams a couple times now, I shouldnt have been move. Except, whenever I was a grapheme in the theatre of these dreams, Id always had awareness of it. Id watched me and felt me. Now, I saw myself approach Seth exactly the same way Id seen Maddie and Brandy approach him. I was still objective. No inner connection. Again, just like watching a movie. I didnt entirely understand it, but nothing the Oneroi did should really go against me anymore.Hey, I (she?) said, shelving a couple books. They were copies of The Scarlet Letter, and Id set them in new releases.Hey, said Seth, a weird mix of shyness and familiarity in his manner. Hows it going?Not bad, I said. Quiet day. Mostly just putting away books.Youve got Maddie doing reviews.Yeah, well, I thought she could handle it. Besides, this dress is new. Itd be a compassion to keep it hidden.My watching self had already noticed the dress because that w as jiffy nature to me. It was a great dress but not necessarily one to wear to work. It was a silk sheath that stopped high on the thigh, with straps tying around the neck and a scoop neckline that showed a tidy amount of cleavage. There was no bra anywhere. I looked like I should have been clubbing, not shelving. Seeing as this whole vision was no memory of mine, the dress only furthered the fact that this was one of the lies. I wasnt claustrophobic to tart it up, but even I had boundaries at work.Seth seemed surprised at the dress but not unappreciative. You should be hand-selling, he said. Go outside with a book, and I bet you could push it on anyone.This dress might not work on everyone, I pointed out.He gave me one of those little smiles of his, and I wondered if the other Georgina melted like I did. The dress is only half of it. Youre charming enough to talk anyone into anything.I gave him a smile in return, one that was both cheery and sly. Anything?The innuendo didnt ra mp up because Kayla suddenly pranced over and wrapped her arms around Seths legs. He scooped her up and glanced around. What happened to Kendall? No finance books for bad babysitters.My alter ego peered over toward the magazines. Is that her? I sounded uncertain, which was odd because when Seth turned to see, it was perfectly obvious it was Kendall. She was reading Forbes.Seth sighed and called her over. She brightened when she saw me. Hi, Georgina Youre so delightful today.Thanks, I said, beaming.You were supposed to be in charge, said Seth. Go get the twins. Hopefully they havent wandered out into traffic.Kendall shook her head. Theyre playing with puzzles. But she raced off nonetheless.Kayla was staring around the store in that distrait way children her age had, watching the people and sights. Seth gave her a slight nudge. What about you? Arent you going to say hi to Georgina?Kayla glanced in the direction he indicated, looked me over, and then continued her survey of the store . It wasnt so much she shunned me or was repulsed by me it was more like she was disinterested. I didnt stand out to her more than any other patron or even one of the shelves.One of her moods, said Seth apologetically.Brandy surfaced, still annoyed by the shoes, but immensely elated to see me. The rest of the girls were rustled up, and after a bit more chatting, Seth and the nieces left me to my bad shelving. Hed continued holding Kayla in his arms, and she suddenly turned to him in all seriousness.When are you going to find Georgina? she asked. Her voice was small and sweet. She rarely spoke, so I always loved the sound of it when she did.He frowned, trying to open the van door with one hand. Brandy helped him. We just saw Georgina, he said. Inside.No, we didnt, said Kayla.We did. You snubbed her, he teased. I told you to say hello.That wasnt Georgina. You have to find her.What have you been smoking? Brandy asked, taking over to buckle Kayla into her booster. That was Georgina.Set h sighed. Be careful with your choice of expressions.The topic dropped after that, but as they drove back to Terry and Andreas, a chill ran through me. Kayla knew. Kayla knew I was gone. This must be a true dream after all. Wed learned belatedly that she had the faintest stirring of psychic powers and the ability to perceive some things on the otherworldly plane. She had a vague sense of my aura, and shed realized that it wasnt me in the store. Thats why shed been so disinterested. It was also why I hadnt been inside that Georgina. It wasnt Georgina.Then who was it?With a sinking feeling, I immediately answered my own question. Who else would have an interest in looking like me and flirting with Seth?Simone. Simone was impersonating me in my absence, I was certain of it. give-and-take of a bitch. I couldnt feel her aura in this dream form, and no mortal could, period. Except for Kayla. Fuck. This was not what I needed.The rest of Seths day was uneventful, though he thankfully ne ver ran into me again. Andrea returned, and it was then I learned shed been at a doctors appointment. She thanked Seth for his help, though it took a long time for him to leave, repayable to all the younger girls good-byes.Seth finally returned to his condo and spent the day writing, which was boring for me to watch. I didnt get why the Oneroi hadnt pulled me out yet. Sure, it had been disheartening to see that no mortal knew I was gone, but this dream hadnt had the devastating cause of the others.Evening fell, and Maddie returned home. Seth, engrossed in his work, stayed at his desk until she found him and spun his chair around. She climbed onto his lap, wrapper her legs around him in a way very similar to what I used to do.He smiled at her, wrapping his arms around her as well and returning her hello kiss.How was your paperwork? he asked.Maddie ran her fingers along the side of his face, that love radiating off of her. Nonstop. Georgina left it all on me today. I dont know wha t was up with that.She said she thought you could handle it.Maddie pulled a face. More like she wanted to take the day off and prance around. Did you see that dress she was wearing? I mean, yeah, she can pull off anything she wants to wear, but that wasnt really work appropriate.He laughed and pulled her closer. I think Georgina thinks her wit and charm can let her get away with anything she wants.Yeah, well, shes not as funny as she always thinks she is, grumbled Maddie. And all she got away with today was looking like she was trying to pick up some guy at the store.Wouldnt be the first time, said Seth with a shrug.What?You didnt know? She sleeps with Warren all the time. commonly in his office.I couldnt believe what I was hearing. Not only were the 2 of them mocking me, Seth had also told Maddie about my on-again off-again affair with the stores owner Warren. Doug had always had his suspicions, but other than Seth, no one else knew. I had never pass judgment Seth to betray that secret.I had no idea, said Maddie. And yetI dont know. Maybe I did. I mean, everything she wears is kind of slutty.She sleeps around a lot. Shell pretty much go home with anyone. He paused. She even tried it with me once.really? Maddies eyes went wide. Whatd you do?Nothing. I have no interest in that. I couldnt handle being with someone so easy. Shed probably sleep with all my friends while we were dating. He cupped Maddies face in his hands. Not that it matters. I have no reason to even go looking, not when I have the best thing right here.He drew her to him, and they kissed again. It wasnt the preliminary hello kiss either. It was deep and ardent, both of them eagerly trying to get as much of the other as they could. His hands gripped hold of the butt of her tank top and jerked it over her head, revealing a black satin bra I was pretty sure Id helped her pick out. Never breaking the kiss, his hands then went around her waist as he half-carried, half-stumbled out of the office a nd into the bedroom. They fell onto the covers, hands moving all over each others bodies and kisses starting to spread beyond lips.No, I thought, unsure if the Oneroi could hear me or not. No. I dont want to see this. Take me back. Take me back to the box. mastermind me to another dream.But if they were there, they werent listening. I had no eyes to close. I couldnt look away. There was no way to unsee what I was seeing. Id experienced a lot of heart-wrenching things in my relationship with Seth, things that had hurt me so badly that I swore I wanted to die. But nothing, nothing could have prepared me for seeing him have sex with another woman. And it wasnt just watching the act itself, the way their naked bodies intertwined with one another and the cries of pleasure elicited in the height of orgasm.It was the look on his face as he did it. There it was. The love Id been probing for earlier. Id thought before he only regarded her with a strong affection, similar to the fond love h e had for his nieces. No. This was passion I saw on his face, the kind of love that burned so deeply, it connected cardinal peoples souls.He was looking at her the way hed once looked at me.I had never thought it was possible. Somewhere, somehow, Id been convinced that he loved her in a different way from me. Maybe their love was strong, but Id felt certain it could never match what he felt for me. Ours was different. Yet, seeing them now, I saw that wasnt true. And when, at the end, he told her she was his world just as hed once told me I knew that I really was nothing special. The love he had for me was gone.And in the terrible, harrowing pain of that moment, I no longer wanted to die. There was no point because I was certain just then that I had died because surely, surely, funny house couldnt be worse than this.